Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Why are you anthropomorphizing the scar so much?

Susanne (I’d link to her blog here, but I don’t know if she has one) asked me this question

“Wow, Becky. What's the big deal of "So mama can begin life with The Scar"? Why are you anthropomorphizing the scar so much? What's the big deal about having one? What does it stop you from doing, and why does it bear any relevance whatsoever in your life the moment it heals?”

Anthropomorphizing basically means to place human characteristics upon that which is not human. In literature, we call it personification. Until you asked your question, I hadn’t thought about it. After looking back at some of what I’ve written, I think it’s because if I give the Scar a life and character of it’s own, I can detach from it. The Scar is not me; the Scar is the Scar. It’s an ugly scar and I don’t like to think of it as part of my body. My body was “fearfully and wonderfully made” and this Scar surely was not.

What does the Scar stop me from doing? Why does it bear any relevance in my life? Because I have this scar I cannot give birth in a birth center. Because I have this scar, many midwives are legally not allowed to attend my births. Because I have this scar, there is a very large number of hospitals around this country that will not “allow” me to give birth as I was created to. Because of this scar, there is a dwindling number of doctors who would attend my subsequent vaginal births. Because of this scar, I will be forced to drive long distances to find a willing care provider. Because of this scar, I have to hear comments from ignorant strangers and family members, “but aren’t you afraid your uterus will explode?!”

Because of this Scar.

My chicken pox scars don’t prevent me from doing anything. No one worries about my old pimple scars. OBs don’t mind if you have old scars from a broken wrist.

5 comments:

April - Vaginas, they're not just painted on! said...

Hi :)

I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your blog! A friend passed the link onto me.
Would love it if you would come take a peek at my blog ;)

much love to you xo

Sheridan said...

That is a really good point. I had never really thought about it. I have a scar and it is just there, I don't think about it too much. But it certainly has more of an impact on my life and my birthing option than any other kind of scar may.

Also we all need to deal with our emotions in different ways and if antrhomorphizing your scar helps you to heal... than go for it!

Hugs!

Jill said...

Not to mention, since you "aren't allowed" to birth vaginally anymore, you'll get more scars piled on top of that one with each child you have...increasing your risk of placenta previa and/or accretia, which can both be deadly to both you and baby. Fun stuff!

Mere Mortal said...

couldn't have said it better.
you are a warrior indeed.
xoxo

Amanda said...

Late here, but ...NOT to mention that that little scar increases YOUR risk of dying and your uterus rupturing (even if not by much) and all the other complications like were mentioned, in future preganancies... I can attest to that... 2 c/s scars THEN a UR w/ my third that killed my son and nearly killed me (was revived) and now barren...THAT's what the big deal is.